Monday, November 15, 2010

thankfulness

I've been thinking a lot about thankfulness lately. Maybe it's because it's November or because I'm just feeling pretty thankful. I figured it's worth sharing my thoughts here. That seems to be part of the point of having this blog. As I've been thinking about it all I can't figure out how to really define thankfulness. Part of it feels like comfort, peace and joy even in the midst of hard things. It feels like making an effort to see the good, even when it's covered up with so much bad. Or even still being thankful in the midst of bad even if you can't see the good or there isn't any. It might feel a little like comfy pants, a hoodie and fuzzy slippers on a cold fall day. I'm not really sure, but I do know I've had glimpses of it lately.

I am thankful for a God who loves and pursues, remains and comforts, guides and protects, is constant and good at all times.

I am thankful for a husband who loves me and puts up with me, who is willing to listen and walk this crazy journey with me, who teaches me so much and is a safe place for me to cuddle up to when I'm feeling mostly sad and alone.

I am thankful for this sweet little lady, Charis Root, who brings such joy and delight to my heart, who has the biggest chocolate brown eyes and yummiest cheeks and most unique personality, who wakes up joyful every day and reminds me of a love that is real and deep.

I am thankful for the fire red and golden trees that linger in these late fall days, especially when the sun streams through.

I am thankful for the yummy meals being brought to us by friends, busy moms, and even strangers.

I am thankful for my friend, Jen, for loving us and throwing Charis the best 1st birthday ever. ever.

I am thankful for my friend, Hannah, who calls to wake me up every morning to "help" me get out of bed so I can go swimming.

I am thankful for my church and community who loves us and isn't afraid of sadness or awkwardness.

I am thankful for miracles.

I am thankful for itty bitty twin baby girls and for their mommy.

I am thankful for my ugg boots and not ashamed to have them even though I've made fun of them for so long.

I am thankful for getting to spend some time with my friend and cancer survivor sister, Sarah, who told me that surgery "wasn't as bad as she thought." (hope that is true for me too)

I am thankful for my mom who does all my laundry when she's in town.

I am thankful for high school girls who call and text me on my birthday, who text me at 10 at night to tell me she prays for me whenever she hears taylor swift (which I know is a lot), and who are willing to let me share life with them.

I am thankful for the many friends who watch Charis for us and love her too.

I am thankful for swimming.

I am thankful for the many friends who love and care for me. I have some pretty amazing friends...some I've know a really long time and some not so long, but who all are really pretty incredible

I am thankful that chemo worked and that when it comes down to it, I'm doing good.

I feel like if I sit here and continue to think about things to be thankful for, I could have a really long post. Even though I would say I'm a "glass half full" kind of person, I'm not a happy-go-lucky-life-is-good type of person. I think God has taught me a lot about really feeling and allowing myself to go through the hard as well as the easy. The point is that in the midst of one of the hardest years of my life I am still able to be thankful without ignoring the things that make me mad or sad or grieve. I can actually do both. Tis the season to be thankful and eat a lot of yummy food.

3 comments:

Rebecca said...

I love this post; what an incredible statement - to truly feel thankful while still acknowledging and feeling sadness. I am thankful for YOU!

Theanne and Baron... said...

Super post...you inspire me everytime time I visit "marginalia"...God bless you!

tommig777 said...

I'm thankful for your mommy, for raising such a wonderfully goofy, fun-loving, happy, beautiful, caring, thankful Amy!! You make me cry smiling tears!!! ;)